"Dance of the Lightning Men" is a very funny "How To" if you want to photograph lightning

Anyone who reads this blog knows I am in love with the nature photography of Stephen Oachs. Through my association with him (I've worked with him, mostly as his editor and copywriter, for over ten years), I am learning a little about photography. (Please, no jokes about my being a slow learner!) But, an additional perk is, I'm becoming electronically acquainted with other talented, skilled and gifted photographers.

One of these is Brian Rueb, a fellow who has a winning and witty way with words. I follow his Flickr stream, where he is known as "chaybert," and his stories never fail to get me to laugh out loud, chuckle repeatedly...and occasionally let out a snort from being caught off guard. He has a knack for tossing in something unexpected and totally engaging. (It was one of his posts that resulted in my finding Dixie Doodle and adopting her through PetFinder.com!)

Brian is a very talented and accomplished photographer who teaches art and photography to high school students. As if that's not enough camera time, he also co-instructs with Stephen Oachs, in outdoor digital photography workshops that are repeatedly sold out--and big hits. After you read Brian's story, you'll understand how fun those workshops must be!

So, without further ado, and with generous permission from Brian Rueb, here is an as-is reprint of his instructions on how to photograph lightning...

Tonight’s lightning storm was brief…but exciting…I always love watching light shows…the kind that just change color, and the kind that can pump you full of about billion volts….this was both.

The lightning was tricky to capture, and never quite the big blasts I hoped for but it was still impressive…but the color was INTENSE…I’ve never seen reds this deep and vibrant in a sunset before…and so focused to a small area. It just kept going and going. I thought I was the only one enjoying the show when I turned and saw my friend Jesse out shooting as well. It was nice to see someone else had the same idea.

This storm was also nice in that it didn’t rain….so I was able to photograph AND stay dry. If you decide to try your hand at lightning photography try these tips…

1) Bring a spare battery….shooting multiple 30 second exposures can be a pain…and a drain on the ol’ battery.

2) Be prepared to have about 1200 images that look the same, and have no lightning…or you can delete the non-lightning ones right after you take the shot…be prepared that the best lightning will happen while you’re deleting that last non-lightning image.

3) Using a GND filter is sweet…it’ll help give you a bit more light on the foreground…lightning does a pretty sweet job of acting like a fill light in the sky.

4) Get comfortable…you’ll be there a while.

If safety is your biggest concern…try these little useless tidbits to calm your nerves...because if you get hit…chances are you’ll be a human charcoal pile.

1) Try to assure yourself that doing things like wearing flip-flops will insulate you, and you’re perfectly safe.

2) If you’re big metal tripod gets hit…it will lessen the blow…and keep you safe….plus your tripod will now have super powers…and glow. Awesome.

3) Lightning only strikes people with mullets…

4) Lightning is too pretty to cause harm.

5) If birds are out…surely they would go hide if it were truly dangerous out…you’re safe.

6) Do a little dance…nobody ever gets hit by lightning while doing the robot.

7) Make sure your photo buddy is dressed in tin foil…they’ll think it odd…but you’ll know better.

8) Bring Jiffy Pop…after your speedy recovery…you’ll be hungry.

9) Wear sunglasses…if you can’t see it…it can’t hit you.

10) Taunt it. We all know it’s way harder to focus when being taunted…it’s why sports is the way it is. Lightning works in a similar fashion. If you taunt it mercilessly it will become frustrated, and not be able to hit you….

I hope that helps. And worse case scenario….pain is temporary…good photography lasts long after you’re a piece of burnt toast.